I wish I could take the credit….
I wish I could say that it was all my strength… my tenacity…
I wish I could say that the mending of my heart after being shattered into a million pieces was due to all the work and sacrifices I made.
The overextended effort to guard it carefully and lend it sparingly.
Truth is…. I was a mess…. yes… a mess.
Hurt, broken, living on a thread of hope.
I can’t take the credit for anything.
But where did the supernatural strength come from at times I was at my weakest?
How did anyone know to pray for me when I hadn’t uttered a word concerning this war between my heart and my flesh?
And even the desire to keep going - after I knew in my heart that I really wanted to give up because….I’d had enough.
Then out of nowhere, a sudden knock….
I won’t answer - I immediately thought.
No way I was taking another chance after all I’ve been through.
That door was sealed shut…. PERIOD
I was taking no chances of being hurt again.
Should I entertain the thought of discreetly tiptoeing to peep and see who it was. Then again, why even bother?
The more I ignored them, the knocks became louder and even more persistent. I couldn’t un-hear them. I couldn’t get the rhythm of that sound out of my head. I was in such a vulnerable state.
.
Who sent them??? Ughh
I don’t know why they’d think I’d take a chance on letting them in.
***Shrugs***
Moments passed, but they didn’t give up and something inside wouldn’t let me ignore them at all.
I couldn’t resist. I mean, I’ve taken chances with so many other things, why not give this a shot after all?
It’s my choice if I want them in or not, right?
So yeah, on my tippy toes I peeked.
My goodness! He didn’t come alone… that figures
He definitely might not be getting in tuhday.
Just show up at my house unannounced, with someone I don’t know? Smh
Someone I never met before.
Okay, I’m done going back and forth in my head.
I’m done thinking the worst.
I’m done with doing things my own way,
So against my better judgement….
I opened the door. What was I thinking???
Yup…. I opened the door.
I’ve seen many who looked like him, sounded like him… perpetrated him… but, I must admit… there was something about him that was solid and genuine. He stood out from the rest. I could see it and feel it.
He was so pure hearted. So kind.
And the guy with him, Both demeanors were very much alike.
They actually kinda’ favored a bit. Maybe brothers or cousins?
Hmm…At this point it didn’t matter.
They kindly introduced themselves.
By now I know you are itching to find out who they are and what happens next…. Right?
Their names: Healing and Forgiveness.
What beautiful and fitting names!!!!
As they came in and made themselves at home, I began feeling lighter. The air became clearer. There was a peace that came upon me, like nothing I had ever felt before. The heaviness I had been carrying was gone.
It was no longer about why I was hurting, who hurt me, who done what to me - my focus was on these two divine beings that walked through my door - Healing and Forgiveness. I was so eager to receive all they brought for me.
All I know is from that day forward, my life has never been the same.
Like me, some of you have opened many doors to many things and people over the course of your life’s journey.
Some deliberate, and some unintentional. Some you were proud of, and some brought on shame, embarrassment, resentment, despair, regret, hurt, pain, unforgiveness, and bitterness.
But one of the greatest and biggest doors you could ever open, is the DOOR of your HEART.
We are sometimes eager to open doors to the things we don’t need, but yet hesitate opening the door to the things we really need.
If you were anything like me, opening that particular door wasn’t a problem to do. It was WHO I was opening that door for - that’s what matters most.
Some doors bring chaos… and some doors bring peace and healing.
What and who have you invited into the door of your heart?
I pray this short story has inspired and encouraged you to close unnecessary doors, and open the door of your heart to God so that He can come in to save, change, heal, and deliver you.
S. Jones
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